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[Trashed] EmmetKing's Application
#1
In Game Name(IGN):
EmmetKing.

Why do you want to join?
I wish to join because this server seems to be very professional and I love roleplay servers! The server I usually play on closed down recently so I need a new "primary" server, so to say.

Do you have any RP'ing experience?
As I mentioned before I have played other roleplay servers. I still have more to learn about roleplaying although I do understand the necessity of staying in character ect.

Tell us a bit about yourself:
Just give us a general overview of who you are and what you like to do/don't like to do.

Im Emmet, I am from Ireland! I enjoy playing Minecraft :3 And I really love playing on roleplay servers with a good backstory!

Your Character Biography:
My character is young. Hes 15. He lost his family in the civil war caused by the Xitians. He was forced to beg for food and bear necessities. He has relied on other people his whole life. He has not lived through much of our lore, he understands the political tension and prefers not to voice his opinion. He stays quiet keeps his mouth shut, but he can be quite charming and convincing thanks to his skills learned when he had to beg for a living.

Specify your character's skills:
Give us a list of skills your character has. They need to be logical and fit with the Lore.

He can be very convincing as he had to beg for everything he needed to live. Sometimes he had to steal his food when times were hard, he is very good at staying hidden and even stealing if it comes to it. (Although my character would never steal unless he believed he needed to)

Do your character bring anything to the setting (part from clothes)?
Please list any personal belongings your character might be bringing to the setting. Note that you will not receive any items in-game to
represent them!

My character has a common bow that one sentimental old man had given him when he was out begging one day. The man had intended for my character to sell it for food but my character keeps it by his side at all times as sleeping on the street it provides invaluable protection.

Anything you'd like to add:
If you have any comments or questions, you can make them here.

I really love roleplay servers and even if my application is not up to scratch it is just because I am so anxious to play on the server!

By the way. Should I use a skin that matches my character? :3
#2
Hi, and welcome to Mesalia! I'm 3llusive and I'll be reviewing your application today. There are some things that we need to work on with your application, so lets get to it.

--

1. More overall detail is required in your backstory. Try to work in some detail about his hardships and any happy times that might help explain how he's become who he is at present. Try to leave the guesswork out of your backstory and explain really just how his life played out. For example, try to include details on who his parents were, and perhaps if he has any memories of them. Describe how long he lived out on the streets and how that affected him on a personal level. Please revise your backstory to explain him a bit more.

2. More detail for your character's personality is required. I'd like to know more about who your character is. I want you to let me know how your character thinks, what he values, and perhaps how he deals with other people. You can try to work these details into your backstory, or you can add a separate section on his personality if that is preferable.

3. Revision of your character's skills is needed. Be thorough with your list of skills and try to specify exactly what level of proficiency he is at them. For example, you mention your character using a bow -- yet you don't list him having any skill in archery. Please revise it in a manner that makes it as clear as possible on what your character's capabilities are.

4. Please revise your formatting. The text being completely unbolded and typeface makes it somewhat difficult to find specific points of your application and in a couple places you accidentally left in a bit of the subtext from the format page. If you would go back and bold the outline of the application it'd help with reviewing it greatly.

This is application is a good example of what to include in your application: (http://www.mesalia.net/forum/showthread.php?tid=221)

I look forward to your revisions. Good luck!
3llusive
#3
Hi Emmet.

I regret to inform you that as I’ve not heard back from you within 3 days of my review, I’m afraid I’m going to have to trash your application. This doesn’t mean that you should give up, however. I look forward to a new application from you in the near future.

My apologies,
3llusive
  


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