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Rumndumm Ironheart
#1
Name: Rumndumm Ironheart

Age: 27

Gender: Female

Skills:

Mining: Advanced
  • She knows the ins and outs of mining, the dangers of it, and how to proficiently extract ores from the earth by minimizing those dangers. She knows her way around a mine, even without her light, and can typically come out unscathed.




Foraging: Apprentice
  • As all children of Fogstone are trained to do, Rumny can figure out general edible plants out in the field. Moreover, she knows how to harvest insects and bugs that are safe to eat.




Items brought along:
Stonefire-grade steel pickaxe (Diamond Pickaxe)
Cast iron pot (Cauldron)
Spherical Lantern (Redstone Lamp)
Gilbert will likely be leaving soon, so this is more or less still going to be my second character by the time this gets approved.
#2
Made a small edit: added item bit, and a bit of the backstory to add more relation to the lore.
#3
Hey Young. Guess what. I'm grading this. lol.

1. Skill Descriptions: I need you to go into detail of what her skills are. I see the levels of the skills, but I need something that describes what she can do exactly.

2. Story ending: More of a usual and personal pick of mine, I feel the story should end with her properly going to the F.L rather than being stuck in the mines and getting out at some undisclosed time.

3. Activities: Did she do anything other than mine? The story said she wasn't interested in boys and what not, but what about other activities? What did she do in her home life or free time that wasn't mining? What was her family life like?

4. Foraging: The skill just seems to be here but I read nothing on her learning this skill. Who taught her? When did she learn if she spent all her time mining?


That should be it. Everything else looks pretty solid to me. Fix this and I will take another look.
#4
1. Skill Description: Done.

2. Story Ending: Also done.

3. Activities: I added a few more paragraphs to give an idea of how her upbringing was. I didn't edit any of the previous bit, just read on.

4. Foraging: This is kind of a default skill for anyone from Fogstone. It's in the lore I submitted ages ago. Every youth from the ages between 8-20 works to provide the town with food by foraging, besides their regular jobs either smithing or mining.
#5
Looks good to go in my opinion. Approved. Have fun.
  


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